What’s Wrong With Me? The Surprising Truth You Must Know
You know that feeling that something didn’t click in your life? That “something” that makes you wonder “what’s wrong with me?”
And that feeling is not the only problem: the fact that you don’t know its origin is causing you even more itches.
That uncertainty is giving you no rest.
In addition, the more you ask yourself the fatal question “what is wrong with me?”, the more you feel overwhelmed. You see no clear answer at the horizon.
Which – you’ll find it interesting – is something that has happened to most (maybe all) of the people.
Doubt is a Part of Every Human Being
For years I took tons of wrong decisions:
- Frequented (and completed) a university that wasn’t going to give me the life I wanted
- Made lots of horrible investment, thus losing a lot of money
- Ended good relationships and kept bad relationships
- Had hobbies that were ruining the lifestyle I really wanted
As a result, I started wondering “what is wrong with me? Why can’t I make good decisions?”.
After a while, the uncertainty was replaced by anger. I was super-angry because I couldn’t get one thing right.
I wasn’t even sure who/what was the target of my anger:
- At first, I was angry with myself because I wasn’t able to take the right decisions
- Then I got angry with my parents because they didn’t teach me better
- And of course I was angry with the world – because when you don’t know better, it’s always fault of the world
Actually, that seemingly horrible situation was very good for me: I hate anger, I really can’t stand it 🙂
Everyone goes through a series of emotions when faced with a problem. That series of emotions is specific to each person. And one of those emotions is the trigger “Stop! I can’t stand this anymore, it’s time to change NOW”.
This emotion for you may be boredom, disgust, sadness or whatever.
For me it’s anger.
Long story short, to get out of that situation I managed to learn some cool things that improved my life – things that will help you too.
So, first of all, let me ask you a question.
What IS Wrong?
Who does decide what’s wrong?
What is the standard that determines who is right and who is wrong?
Is there a government agency that decides that shy people are wrong, everyone who doesn’t eat paleo is an idiot and that purple socks are for losers?
None that I’m aware of…
The fact is that there’s no right or wrong.
Even when something bad happens…are you sure it’s a wrong thing? Maybe, in the long run, it will end up as your best blessing.
Do you remember my wrong choices that I was talking about at the beginning of this article? Well, attending the wrong university and my poor choices regarding relationships led me to the best choice of my life: building a successful business that allows me to live a marvelous lifestyle!
Put it simply enough: no one can know what’s right or wrong.
This means that no one can tell you “what’s wrong with you?”. When someone asks you this question, the asker is simply showing that he/she is not very smart.
“No one” includes you too 😉
Even if you make tons of mistakes, there’s no way for you to know what hidden gems are laying beyond them.
Not only my story is an example of this…but if you carefully think about it…in your life there are have been mistakes or bad things that turned into something good later on. Think about it, you can find at least one of this!
And, remember: each mistake hides a lesson. Do enough mistakes and you’ll have learned enough to succeed.
Now…let’s do a step further…
What’s Wrong With Me? Is This the Right Question?
What does happen in your brain as you ask yourself that question? You start thinking about what is wrong with you.
You may think “I can’t hold my emotions, thus hurting people” or “I am a failure” or “I can’t make friends”. And many more!
Well…not exactly what I would call good thoughts 🙂
The reason is that “what’s wrong with me?” is a horrible question!
The questions you ask yourself are VERY important. Because, as you just noticed, the questions generate thoughts.
Ask yourself horrible questions and you’ll end up with horrible thoughts. Ask yourself great questions and you’ll end up with great thoughts.
By asking “What’s wrong with me?“, you’re already assuming that there’s something wrong with you. Terrible question.
By doing a step back you may ask yourself “is there anything wrong with me?”. This is already a better question: you aren’t assuming anymore that you are a bad person, you’re wondering if you are right or wrong.
But this is still quite far from being a good question.
Because you’re open to the possibility that there’s something wrong with you. On a good day, everything is fine and probably you would answer “No way, I’m an amazing person!”…but what do you do when your boss blames you or when your partner is a bad mood? You’ll end answering “Of course, there’s something wrong with me. But…what is it?”
Let’s do a step further and find some good questions to ask yourself…
When you ask yourself empowering questions you’ll be way more resourceful – thus living a higher quality life.
So, let’s find some good alternatives to “what’s wrong with me?”
The reason of that question is that you’re doubting about who you are or what you’re doing (or have done).
Let’s assume you actually made a mistake – but often that isn’t even the case.
You can ask yourself these empowering questions, for example:
- “What can I do differently next time?”
- “What can I learn from this experience?”
- “How can I leverage this to improve my job/relationship/life/etc?”
- “How can I become a better person thanks to this experience?”
Do you see how powerful this is?
When you ask yourself even just one of this questions, you’ll:
A) feel good
B) be in a resourceful state that will help you improve your life
Yes, of course, it won’t be easy to take control over your mind and ask yourself these questions the first times…but with practice, they’ll become natural.
Now, you have a powerful tool to improve your inner state and your life. Use it 😉
This is just one of the endless possibilities!
Questions have the power to completely transform your life. If you want some help to leverage this powerful tool, feel free to think about borrowing my mind.
And now…here’s a good question: “What other empowering questions can you ask yourself instead of thinking about what’s wrong with you?”
Put your answer in the comments 😉